Overheard at Work, vol. LXII

A full week and a half back from our long break, and we're all settling back into the routine. I have been remarkably productive since my return from vacation, which I attribute to feeling rejuvenated and my 2-year work anniversary having come and gone.

Time flies when you're having fun.

While leading an impromptu hangman game with a room of 8 and 9 year olds, I eventually called on the kids to give me clues for the rest of the group to guess. This was after I chose Madonna as a famous person clue and no one in the room knew who she was. (#281928 my work makes me feel old.) I called a 9-year-old boy up to give me a clue that "everyone would know," and his first choice was: "The Color Purple."

Teen girl: Annie, is that a pretzel necklace?
Me: Yes!
Girl: You're so fresh!

A group of teen boys razzed their friend as he left the club in just a sweatshirt one cold night.
18-year-old boy, in sweatshirt: I just won't go to school tomorrow, if I get sick.
Teen friend: This guy doesn't go to school when his eye itches.

Colleague, wearily: I should have been a weatherman.

Best of 2012

It's fun each year to keep a running tab of the books, movies, music, and theatre that I've enjoyed most each year. 

This year, though, I didn't read enough books or see enough movies or theatre. 

I guess I've been busy.

BOOKS

Committed by Elizabeth Gilbert

Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns) by Mindy Kaling

Then Came You by Jennifer Weiner

Flat-Out Love by Jessica Park

The Day I Ate Whatever I Wanted by Elizabeth Berg

Wild by Cheryl Strayed

tiny beautiful things  by Cheryl Strayed

This is How You Lose Her by Junot Diaz

MOVIES

Being Elmo: A Puppeteer’s Journey

Moonrise Kingdom

The Dark Knight Rises

Take This Waltz

MUSIC

“A Girl, a Boy, and a Graveyard” by Jeremy Messersmith

Sweeter by Gavin DeGraw, especially “Not Over You”

Unbroken by Demi Lovato, especially “Fix a Heart”

Once Upon Another Time by Sara Bareilles, especially ”Bright Lights and Cityscapes”

Looking 4 Myself by Usher, especially ”Dive”  and “2^nd Round”

“Some Nights” by Fun.

Channel ORANGE by Frank Ocean, especially ”Bad Religion”

THEATER

One-Minute Play Festival at the Boston Playwrights Theatre

Sugar at ArtsEmerson

Café Variations at Emerson Stage

I cannot believe how fast 2012 has gone, and I'm glad the world didn't end, so I can keep on writing for you.

The new year will bring more adventures and misadventures from work, fun with friends and family, and my GIGANTIC 30th birthday celebration.

Watch out, 2013, I'm coming for you.

Happy new year, everyone!

Overheard on Vacation

What a whirlwind of a hilarious vacation week this has been. Full of Christmas gatherings, lots and lots of food, wine, and laughs.

Spending time with my cousins and their two boys, 6 years old and 20 months old, has been truly unforgettable and wonderful and I am so sorry my time with them is over.

Here are some of the highlights of the week, in quote form:

6-year-old, explaining to his little brother: Santa won't hurt you. Unless it's a homeless guy.

Me, to the 6-year-old, who had his hands down his pants: I'm just going to start calling you Penis Hands.
Him: I'm gonna start calling you Burpy.
Me: That's perfect!
*high five*
Him: Now you're Penis Hands.

6-year-old, while watching A Christmas Story, proving that his generation is conditioned to violence and chaos: Is the old man gonna steal the lamp? Is the lamp gonna explode? Did he get run over? Is fudge a bad word? Is she calling the police?

Me, to my cousin's stunning 88-year-old grandmother: You look like a movie star!
Her: Lassie?

Me: What rhymes with berry?
6-year-old: Perry!
Me: ...OK.
Him: No, like Katy Perry!
Me: OK!...What rhymes with orange?!
Everyone: That's so mean!
Him: ...Nothing.

6-year-old, on seeing a Rolling Stones logo on the side of a truck: Look! A kissing truck!

Overheard at Work, vol. LXI

Two special events down, one to go.

Last week, my colleague, some of our teens, and I presented at a mid-point convening for our art-social justice program. Tonight, ten musical acts performed for the entire club, and I am so proud and relieved and thrilled and moved at how it went, I could cry.

Wednesday is our annual Holiday Party, including the debut of my play program's show, "Fractured Fairy Tales." I will be happy to get through the next few days of work and be on vacation for an unprecedented 12 days at the end of this year.

My supervisor, while discussing banana milk: I thought they milked bananas. *insert vulgar gesture here*

12-year-old boy: Ladies are really impatient these days!
12-year-old girl: You just noticed that?

Same 12-year-old boy: My shoulder cost like $800. I'm a robot.

And, while showing me his video games magazine, and a picture of the Revolutionary War: This was the old times, with George Bush.

8-year-old girl, summarizing the book she had just read: The cat in the hat. He holds too much stuff!

Overheard at Work, vol. LX

We're getting down to the end of the season at work, which means in the next 2 1/2 weeks, I have three special events to either prep kids for, host, or run myself.

But then I have a 12-day vacation, so I CANNOT COMPLAIN!

Colleague: This guy is Captain of the Los Angeles Flakers!

Teen girl: Those boys couldn't figure out how to pop my hood.
Colleague: That's dirty.

Lateral lisp kid, after completing his homework: I go psycho. And I love going psycho. It's a living for me.

Teen boy, to a colleague who had his arm around me: Stop hooking on my shorty, yo.
Me, to colleague: Was he speaking English?

Colleague, during a staff meeting: I want to be drunk.

11-year-old girl: If I have a daughter, I want her to be born in Fiji. Either Fiji or Ohio.

Later, she said: Middle school is so hard. You can never tell when a boy likes you.
(I told her it doesn't really get easier after middle school...)

14-year-old girl, about another 14-year-old girl: She had her first boyfriend when she was like 1!

Overheard at Work, vol. LIX

Is anyone else thoroughly confused that it's almost Thanksgiving? Only two days of work are between me and a little break. And only six weeks of work are between me and a BIG break.

Crazy.

9-year-old, a propos of nothing: Wait! Can we celebrate and go pantsless?

I had a discussion with an 18-year-old and some middle schoolers about voting. I was very excited that the 18-year-old had been able to vote and everyone was very curious about whom he had voted for. In response to the fact that everyone was happy he had voted for Obama, a 13-year-old said, "You guys are crazy. I would have voted for Romney because he was going to help the wealthy white. I am white and wealthy." (I kind of wanted to punch her in the mouth.)

An 8-year-old gave me the best advice on how to play basketball ever: You just use your strength to push the ball up. And it doesn't matter if you miss or not.

An 8-year-old boy, incredibly earnestly: I was born on October 8, 2012.

Me, to an 8-year-old whom had separated from the group I was picking up from the adjacent elementary school: You need to stay with the group!
8-year-old: There was something I had buried I forgot to get back...I bury lots of things for no reason.

Today also marked my karaoke debut for the kids who come to that program. I wanted to sing something silly and fun with my music teacher, so we did "I Want It That Way," and mid-song, I heard my name, so I turned toward the 10-year-old who had said it, who then said, "Annie...you should give her the mic now."

This job certainly keeps me humble.

Overheard at Work, vol. LVIII

Sorry it's been so long.

Last week sucked, as we endured a hurricane, a funeral, and a funeral reception at work. We're all kind of crawling out of that funk of a week slowly.

This week, we enjoyed an Aerosmith concert down the street and the reelection of a President who will keep our business running because he supports the middle-class, non-profits, the arts, and immigrants.

Fewf.

Me, about and to an 8-year-old boy: I love him and I hate him.
Him: Same here!

And, after we moved him to work alone because he was being disruptive: Gosh! People these days!

8-year-old boy, every time I touch him: It hurts as hard as I can remember...I'm very delicate. I'm like a skeleton.
(Mind you, I do super annoying things like stick my finger in his ears. So I don't blame him for crying wolf.)

12-year-old girl: I do my best work at the last minute.
Me: You're a super procrastinator?
Her: I'm really good at it!

Colleague, after my other colleague and I had an in-depth conversation sotto voce: Women...are really good...at whispering.