Overheard at Work, vol. LXXXIV

It's been a remarkably busy but productive and smooth couple of weeks. We are running our entire fall program, including Saturday programming and late-night Fridays.

I've managed to continue to stay on top of things, rather than chasing them, which I inevitably do at some point each season.

I always collect fewer quotes when it's busy!

Colleague A, after giving me a high five that left much to be desired: Was it the worst you've ever had?

Colleague B, to a teen girl: Your brother is getting sassy lately!
16-year-old girl: It's cuz he's watching Full House now!

14-year-old girl, a propos of nothing much: Don't nuns get horny and have to like please their needs?

Me, to a colleague, regarding his inability to keep a secret: You ruined everything!
Colleague: I usually hear that from women.

9-year-old boy, lingering at the office door, then peeking his head in: Hashtag I made a necklace!

Overheard at Work, vol. LXXXIII

Well, fall isn't kicking my ass yet. Next week's going to be a bit of a doozy, and there are a lot of things in motion at work, so I'm still sort of expecting the shit to hit the fan at some point soon.

In the meantime,

Me, to a 14 year old boy: You don't have a shirt on!
Boy: WHY?

10 year old girl, reading from the cover of a magazine: "How to Spot and Drop a Gold Digger"
Me: Do you know what a gold digger is?
Girl: *motions picking her nose*

7 year old boy: Guess what! I'm in first grade!
Me: What are you doing in first grade right now?
Boy: Um. We have to be quiet. And do math.

Me, to my colleague, as I locked up the building: What did I forget?
Colleague A: The pool.
Me: Yes! Thank God you reminded me!
Colleague A: Yeah. Otherwise someone might sneak in and steal our pool.

Colleague B: What would your superpower be?
Colleague C: Probably being able to execute the robot dance flawlessly.

9 year old girl, to me: Are you married?
Me: No.
Girl: Do you have a boyfriend?
Me: No.
Girl: You're single?
Me: I'm single.
Girl: You don't want a boyfriend?
Me: No, I do.
Girl: So get a boyfriend!
Me: YOU get a boyfriend!
Girl: I have one. I'm married.

Overheard at Work, vol. LXXXII

We all got through our first week back with the kids, though this week was Open House, so we had shorter programming hours. Next week is our first full programming week, and I hope it doesn't make me feel like I got hit by a train.

Colleague A, remembering being in a hot tub at our staff retreat: I feel like I'm going on myself and it feels so nice.

Colleague B, discussing milkshakes, but also life: If I'm going to do it, I wanna regret it.

14-year-old girl, having a particularly bad day: I wanna be a Teletubby so bad. They always smile.

10-year-old girl, taking a game of Musical Chairs VERY seriously: Two boys, two girls. We have to win it for MOTHER RUSSIA!

15-year-old girl: 3:40, it gets CRAZY! That's when the delinquents come!
Me: Delinquents? That's rude!
Girl: At least I used a big word!

To My Cousin's Daughter, on Her 3rd Birthday

Dear E.W.E.,

How are you already 3?

Well, perhaps a better question is, how are you 3 years old with the mind and soul of a much older person?

Sometimes you sass your mama with such attitude, I know exactly what you’ll be like when you’re 16. Or you ask a question with such wisdom and depth, I could swear you’re 50.

Or maybe that you lived a very full and adventurous past life, and now you’ve returned to this world as a hilarious, strong, imaginative child.

A child who, I have no doubts, will change the world.

Simply, you are extraordinary.

You are good at everything you try, whether it be your letters or your speech or your throwing and catching or drumming or charming people or twirling or dancing or jumping.

I am in awe of you.

Your strength of will, your intensity, your confidence in who you are, and your astounding empathy.

I have never met a child so genuinely curious.

You ask, “Mama, what’s YOUR favorite color? Pretzel, what’s YOUR favorite fruit?”

You say “NO” with such conviction, we all stand back.

You tell stories like you have so many coiled up inside you, you’ll never run out of words to share with us.

You want everyone to watch you hop. Or jump. Or dive. Or swim.

And, so we watch.

Riveted.

What will you do next?

I can’t wait to see.

Go, E.W.E.

GO!

I love you. Happy birthday.

Love,

Annie Pretzel

Overheard at Disneyworld

First of all, let me put this trip in perspective.

124 kids ages 10-16 from several agencies in the Boston area were accompanied by 26 staff, for a five day, four night trip to Orlando, Florida.

We hit 5 amusement parks in 5 days:
After a long morning of travel, including my own wake up call at 230 AM, Monday, it was Hollywood Studios; Tuesday, Universal Studios Islands of Adventure; Wednesday, Blizzard Beach; Thursday, Magic Kingdom; Friday, Universal Studios, followed by shuttling to dinner and then the airport for a 9 PM flight. I got home at 245 AM.

Hours were typically 7 AM wake-up, breakfast at the hotel buffet, 10-5 at the park, dinner at the hotel, one evening activity (pool party or arcade), and lights out at 10 PM.

I was in charge of seven teens. And that was plenty!

Honestly, it was a week of high highs and low lows. I struggled daily between not wanting to cramp my kids' style and trying to wield some control. I also didn't want to spend days at these amusement parks ALONE, despite my kids' desire for independence.

By the second day, we'd worked out a little bit of a rhythm. We'd eat breakfast together, ride on the shuttle separately, I'd spend the first half of the day navigating the parks with them and hitting rides I wanted to see, then I'd usher them to a late lunch, and let them roam free until meeting time. This was only mildly successful, in terms of them not totally stomping all over my trust that they'd behave appropriately...

For the record, I rode about 2/3 of the rides the kids did, my favorites being Tower of Terror (which we rode twice) at Hollywood Studios, Rip Saw Falls at Islands of Adventure, Summit Plummet and Team Boat Springs at Blizzard Beach, Space Mountain (which I can't believe I had never been on) at Magic Kingdom, and Transformers 3D and Revenge of the Mummy at Universal Studios.

Aside from that, I spent a fair amount of the days reading a book in air conditioning and venting to my friends via text messaging. I also saw a parade and show at Magic Kingdom that made me cry, got a little bit of a tan, avoided food poisoning, met some cool kids and staff, and managed (despite their best efforts all week to drive me insane) to get all seven of the kids home safe last night.

I think I need this entire three-day weekend to catch up on sleep and healthy eating and sitting in silence, which I've been without for days.

But, without further ado, here are some quotes from the week:

Me, at 4 AM on Monday morning, at the drop-off point: We should take a picture!
14-year-old girl A: You can't see me in the dark!

14-year-old girl B, a propos of nothing: Sometimes when I drop the soap in the shower, I pretend I'm in jail...

14-year-old girl B, while we waited on a line for a ride: I want to bring my kids here. When they're younger than me. I want them to believe it.

14-year-old girl B: Wait, what does Versace mean?

Teen: Oh. My. Pho.

Me, losing my patience (the well of which was far deeper than I even knew), when one of the kids (not even part of my group) said something to the effect of "I told you so!" one too many times: Everyone always has to be right all the time. It's so annoying.
14-year-old boy: I'm never right! I try to suck as much out of those moments as possible!

Girl, trying to get a chaperone's attention, though she didn't really know his name: Brian! Brandon! Deafdon!

During our last night in the hotel, the girls called their mothers to test them by saying that one of the boys on the trip liked them. Here are highlights from those conversations:

14-year-old girl A: What if he tries to kiss me?
Mom A: Tell him, "BACK UP, BUDDY! To the left! To the left!"

14-year-old girl B: My mom told me "Don't let your guard down. Don't settle for anyone."
14-year-old girl A: Usually my mom tells me something like that. Tonight, she told me something different cuz I bet she's drunk!

And at the airport, last night:
Boy: Yermama's so hairy, when you were born, you got rug burn.

Boy, after laughing hysterically: I think I moved my liver!

The End.

Overheard at Work, vol. LXXXI

Guys. That was a crazy week.

Honestly, it's been a crazy month, full of coordinating phone interviews and demos and reference calls and trips to Florida and Friday events and special events and field trips.

Fewf.

But I MADE IT!

And at 3 AM on Monday morning, I will be on my way to Brighton to pick up 7 teenagers for their first trip to Disney World and, for two, their first trip on a plane.

12-year-old boy, to a woman about to run a demo lesson and try to get a job: Could you do that over there? I'm doing something here.

During a conversation about whether or not the club is haunted, two young ladies told me a story of a young boy jumping out at them in the hallway.
Me: But he's 7 years old!
12-year-old: So? 7 year olds can have demons!

11-year-old, singing to herself as she took tiles out of a Bananagrams bag: Y is for you to stay out my bizness. M is for I'm so mean!

Me, amused, to a 16-year-old boy exclaiming as we listened to a recording: You're so excited!
Boy: I love music!

Overheard at Work, vol. LXXX

Since last week was short due to my vacation and this week I was swamped with administrative work--we're in the middle of a big hiring process--I only have a few quotes.

One more week of summer programming before I head to Disney World with seven teenagers and, when I return, we will be prepping for fall programming.

That. Is. Bananas.

17-year-old boy, to me, after incorrectly identifying me when I snuck up behind him and covered his eyes: You smell like a Brazilian.

12-year-old girl: Imagine if a nun said to another nun, "What are you wearing tomorrow?"

Me: What are you going to do with your paycheck?
17-year-old boy: Strip club. All ones.

12-year-old girl: Ow! My blood pressure!...Who's got gas? Whoever has gas, go to the gas station!