Overheard at Work, vol. CI

One more week before we head into summer training and programming. I seriously can't believe it.

AND I'll be 31 in 9 days. Also shocking. Where has 2014 gone?

8-year-old boy: I had the worst nightmare I could ever imagine. The most terrifying dream ever...my aunt was coming to visit.

16-year-old boy: I am a thug. Who needs a hug.

Me, to Colleague A, serving leftover dinner: Do you like beets?
Colleague A: Like, the headphones?

Me, to 12-year-old girl, wearing tangerine pants: I wish I could wear tangerine pants.
Girl: You totally could. They would match your face.

Colleague B, after I urged her to throw out her hummus in light of the Trader Joe's hummus recall: I'm so emotionally charged right now because of this hummus.

12-year-old girl: There are so many songs about lollipops!
Me: Well. That's because they're not really about lollipops.
Girl: I know, I told my mom I wanted a lollipop after hearing a song. "I wanna sing about lollipops!" (changing into Mom voice) "You're grounded."

Me, entering the office: It smells like meat in here.
Colleague C, the only man in the room: Sorry, that's me!