i have a question...

Sunday, February 20, 2011

You Know What's Hard? Dating.

I got an email from someone on [the site that rhymes with Schmoe Schmay Schmupid] early last week, saying that there was a good chance we'd get along and asking if I wanted to get a drink that week.

In the interest of pursuing one of my New Year's resolutions, I decided to be a little impulsive, checked out his profile, asserting that our profiles actually looked an awful lot alike, and told him my schedule.

(My previous MO on this site has been to email until the spark between us fizzles, before we even meet. I thought I'd try something new.)

I had a very full week, as they all are these days, and found out late in the week that I'd have a late day on Friday. Changed plans with the (very flexible) aforementioned date and, eventually, found myself waiting for a train at 8:30 on a Friday night in the hurricane that had spontaneously hit Boston.

Then, the B line only took me four stops because of a previous accident, and I ended up stranded in Packard's Corner, talking to the guy on the phone, and trying to figure out where the hell I was and how I was going to get downtown.

The wind broke my umbrella, and I sloshed through melted snow to hail a cab.

The first one I flagged down pulled over, and my Jamaican cabbie asked me what I was up to that night. What I drank. Whiskey? When I needed to be picked up. And told me I was beautiful about four times.

I figured the evening had taken a turn for the better and went into the bar frazzled but optimistic, which didn't change when I sat down, told the dude the tale of my journey and ordered a glass of white wine.

Still, first dates are awkward, especially in circumstances like ours.

I tried to have a sense of humor about the whole thing but could sense I wasn't making the best first impression.

However, I left the date having made the decision that I liked him enough to want to hang out again, told him to call me and was home by 11 PM.

(His story was that he had plans to see his friends' band and had to leave my 1030. Likely.)

I woke up yesterday and, again, unlike me, emailed him to apologize for my frazzledness and to assert that I would totally hang out again.

He emailed me mere hours later to tell me that, in the interest of being straightforward, he didn't feel a connection strong enough to warrant another meeting...

I know at some point I'll appreciate his candor.

But, in the moment, it stung.

I've talked to a lot of my friends about my foray into online dating.

Most of the ones who know me the best don't think it's a good idea.

They think I'm looking for something more serious than this site will provide.

I even write in my online profile that online dating makes me a little uneasy.

Maybe I just need an attitude adjustment.

But, these guys should take the time to get to know me before they decide they don't like me!

I'd be totally fine with that.


Natron602 said...

Think of how much worse dating would be without the ability to screen their grammar on OKC.

Annie said...

too true! too true!

LaraLev said...

Dude, fuck guys.

I went on a date with a guy that I met online, which we didn't do until after a few weeks of texting/phone talking, so we already liked each other.

Had a great date. Made out outside the restaurant after 3.5 hours of super fun chatting. Even talked to him on the phone a couple days later.

Now? Nothing. Totalllyyyy fizzled. I have no idea why. His job is kinda crazy, but I don't give a shit. I'm awesome. He sucks for not being into it.

I vote you adopt my attitude.

Annie said...

getting there! i promise.