It is My Birthday for One More Hour

I am 28.

I really like the sound of it.

This has been one of the best birthday celebrations I've had in a long while.

It started with a super chill, lovely, alcohol-filled Saturday night with some close friends (complete with devil's food and peanut butter butter creme cupcakes) and continued through the weekend with a boozy brunch and then a long evening of sushi and sake with a super close friend.

Tuesday, I was treated to dinner at my cousin's house and even got time with the baby.

I collected birthday cards from my kiddoes all week, intent on keeping them sealed until today. I also wore a dress and tiara to work because I could. When I got to work, I opened all of the cards and put them on display. There were more than this by the end of the day, plus a couple paintings.


Most touching message: Thank you Annie for all youve done. Love you!
Funniest message: Happy birthday annie write below whatever you want

My job is the best place ever to work if you're celebrating a birthday, except when the kids started telling me I was older than their mothers. Hrmm.

My coworkers got me a card and baked me cupcakes, and one of my art teachers made me this. I almost sobbed.


(I just realized you can see my tiara in this pic!)

Tonight, my friend took me out to dinner, and I came home to hundreds of email and Facebook messages.

This is the first birthday in a long time that I feel like I'm celebrating at home. I've dragged weeks-worth of luggage to New York City before heading to New Haven for the summer for what feels like years (really, it was only 2). But before that, for years and years, I was either unhappy or away from home.

Celebrating in Boston has been really nice, and I have a feeling my 28th year is going to be pretty amazing.

A List of Things I am Distracted By Even Though (or Maybe Because) I'm Exhausted

1. My schedule this week.

(Which really isn't all that different except it FEELS different because I have a couple early meetings and extra things and Friday is a school holiday, which means I have a super early day.)

2. My birthday party.

(Which really isn't all that stressful because I have literally invited my closest friends and we are literally going to meet down my street AND I've already figured out what I'm wearing AND how I'm wearing my hair. I do still have to get a pedicure and call the places to tell them to expect me and my party. But really.)

3. The need to clean my room.

(I was so scattered today at work that I spent the last 45 minutes of my day cleaning my desk. I haven't really had a spare moment to do the same thing in my room, though I know it would make me feel better.)

4. Summer wardrobe.

(I spent two Sundays in a row shopping and made a few excellent purchases, but I still need summery things to wear below the waist. I have not, for the life of me, been able to find shorts or capris that don't make me look like either a sausage or a whore.)

5. The wedding I'll be in in August.

(One of my best friends is getting married this summer. Hers will be the first wedding I've been to of my friends, the first wedding I'll be IN since I was a three-year-old flower girl. And it is distracting me because I need shoes and jewelry to go with the hot purple dress I bought and I need to figure out where I'm staying when I'm in California for it and I need to write an amazing, hilarious, and touching speech befitting what I'm sure will be a ridiculously magical day.)

6. The fact that June is already almost over.

(I know it's only the 13th, but this is also the second-to-last week of afterschool programming for the year at work. Every afternoon, 350 kids show up, squirrely as fuck and ready to tear the walls down because they are so done with school. They never have homework these days and they are just as ready for a vacation as I am. The summer program starts the first week of July and we are all ready.

Not to mention that, as noted above, June ending means I am about to have a birthday. Which brings me to my last point...)

7. Turning 28.

(I learned a long time ago that the body completely regenerates every seven years. When I learned that, I looked back at my life in multiples of 7:

At 7, my mother met my stepfather. An incredibly significant moment in all of our lives. To say the least.

At 14, we moved from Brooklyn to Cambria, CA. Yet another earth-shattering, life-altering moment.

At 21, I spent the craziest, most transformative, heart-wrenching, and eye-opening summer of my life with friends in college.

All this to say, 28 is bound to be...something.)

Tips on Throwing a Successful Bachelorette Weekend in Atlantic City

1. Do not take Jet Blue to New York City. There is a 100% chance your flight will be delayed.

2. On the Greyhound bus to Atlantic City with your friends, do not make eye contact with the older lady in black basketball shorts. She may eat tuna out of a can with her hands and get dangerously close to touching you with them. She may spill soda near or on you. She may come back to the seat you are sharing with her with a long trail of toilet paper in her shorts.

3. Do not underestimate the utter importance of and satisfaction provided by an ocean view from a 12th floor hotel room. Or a swiveling television set.

4. While your bachelorette friend is showering, decorate the room with streamers and caution tape that you smuggled on the bus without her noticing. Be sure not to make too much noise or she may suspect that you're up to something.

5. Drink Jameson and ginger ale out of penis straws while listening to Bachelorette playlists.

6. Wear your bridesmaid and bride-to-be tiaras all weekend, including at the beach. Be prepared for half the people who see you to wish your bachelorette a happy birthday.

7. If you plan on seeing a strip show at Hunkomania, be prepared for some crazy shit. Shit that will make you cringe and confused. Shit that may even offend you. The Flying Wallenda move is pretty impressive though.

8. Plan to go dancing at the Casbah, but make your friend do her bachelorette party scavenger hunt there. If she tells people she's about to get married, they will eagerly do everything from fake walk her down the aisle, to handing over their condoms, to escorting her into the men's room.

9. Eat brunch at My Friends Diner, just because the name is so cute.

10. Be sure to take a walk on the boardwalk and take a couple rides at the carnival. The beach stroll from the pier to Caesars is also lovely. Drinks at Continental are highly recommended, followed by hotdogs at Nathan's and salt water taffy and fudge at Fralinger's.

11. Don't forget to surprise the bachelorette with a rousing game of Pin the Macho on the Man, preferably while drinking champagne and vodka. (Note: do not spin after each sip.)

12. The Believe drag show at Resorts is amazing. Liza and Patti LaBelle are the standouts.

13. Enjoy a three-hour-long late dinner at Buddakan.

14. Don't forget to wear your tiaras on the bus ride home.

15. End the weekend at a gay-friendly establishment like Vynl in New York City, where the waiters will announce that you're "getting married in the mornin'" and may even give you free shots at lunch.

Overheard at Work, vol. XV

Dude. Sorry.

I was really busy, getting through several weekends of intense work events.

And I'm writing TODAY because I'm going to Atlantic City with mah girlz this weekend for the first bachelorette party I have ever been to.

Yes, let the insanity ensue.

12-year-old asking for peppermints from me: One more?
Me: NO!
12-year-old, noting the packaging: Why? It's only 99 cents!

Me, providing clues as to what character I was playing, during a Hot Seat activity: I live on a street with lots of other characters just like me!
Kids: HOBO!
Me: I have two names!
Kid: Poopy Boy!

As we put up paintings in the gallery, we were instructed by one of my supervisors to put two T pins at the bottom of each piece, to avoid curling.
Colleague A: Two in the bottom?
Me: That sounds crowded!
Supervisor: Are you sure you don't need a hammer?
Colleague A: Two in the bottom!
Supervisor: I just didn't know you could use your thumbs that way!
Colleague A: Using my thumbs to get two in the bottom!

8-year-old: Are you a teenager, Annie?
Me: No! I'm much older than that!
8-year-old: You look like a teenager.
Me: Thanks!
8-year-old: You have pimples.

Talking to a kid about how he needs to manage his own money because his mother doesn't use the money he makes to pay his bills on time.
Me: Put it under your mattress.
Kid: I'm not a drug dealer. Or an old Jewish lady.

Overheard at Work, vol. XIV

Sometimes, my job requires me to wake up before 8 AM on a Saturday, put on fancy clothes, and take a band of kids to perform at a recital hall at the Berklee College of Music, where the bassist from Aerosmith is in the audience and gives the band a standing ovation.

NBD.

"I've got a brain for smartness."--an 8-year-old with a shit-eating grin.

Colleague A, while we were putting things away in storage that was once a women's locker room: What is THAT? (pointing to the feminine products dispenser, on the side with the female symbol)
Me: A PAD!
Colleague A: OH! I thought it was like a Prince album or something!

Colleagues B and C are discussing books they like.
Colleague B: You like sci-fi?
Colleague C: I'm a HUGE fantasy dork!
Colleague B: Sea Dork? What's that?

While the band discussed that they should have all grown beards for the performance and that none of them COULD actually grow beards, the 17-year-old guitarist said, proudly, "I could grow a really thick fuzz!"

Overheard at Work, vol. XIII

Um.

Hi.

So, it's really odd to be going through a similar experience at the end of this school year as I did every year I actually was IN school, but the next seven weeks are going to be very intense, and I keep thinking, "Oh, after May 21, when the music showcase and the big work fundraiser are over, I'll feel so relaxed," but I neglect to remember that I will then be committed to working every Saturday in June for RM AND apartment-hunting with all the spare time I have on the weekends.

HA!

I am so tired.

But I did just see my name on the walls of the Museum of Fine Arts, so maybe I shouldn't complain too much.

"Crystal Oceanista."--the name of a kid's stuffed seal. "She's a fashionista."

Me to a work study student on his last day: I know you'll miss ME! You'll miss the shot of estrogen I bring to this room.
17-year-old: Isn't estrogen illegal?
Kid: Estrogen is the female hormone.
17-year-old: Oh!
Kid: THIS is a high school senior.

Peer leader, referring to the rather inappropriate abbreviation "DTF": In hip-hop, it would be wrong. But in life, it would be right.

Me, to a very tall and lanky 14-year-old who had just knocked over some chairs in the art room: You are SUCH a clumsy kid!
Kid (with true exasperation): I'm just SO BIG!

Holy F, See You in June

This week at work was insane. I can't even really tell you how, except that I went from grantor site visits to partnership meetings to covering core areas to finding out I'd have to cover field trips in two days that felt like ten.

We are gearing up for our annual event, and I am still working Saturdays.

All to say that I'll pretty much be zooming through the next eight weeks until the end of June, when I'll stop working my Saturday job, have gotten through the event, and will be able to breathe with a 9:30 to 5:30 schedule over the summer.

Not to mention that my roommates and I are trying to find an apartment for August.

I covered a field trip today that was actually kind of fun and easy, and I have some quotes at work from the week, but my favorite came today, courtesy of a very unique 17-year-old boy.

Kid: I am so excited to have bunk beds next year!
Me: You are EXCITED to have BUNK BEDS?
Kid: Yes, there will be so much room for activities!
Me: ...What KIND of ACTIVITIES?
Kid: [without missing a beat] Like karate! And board games!

I died.