To My Cousin's Baby, on Her First Birthday

Dear E.W.E.,

It was exactly a year ago that your mom’s water broke while she was sitting next to me on the couch and your folks rushed to the hospital.

I held you when you were 12 hours old. And I cried the whole time.

I couldn’t believe you were here. That you were mewing and that I could comfort you so you’d stop.

I couldn’t believe when you stopped being kind of blobby, when you could hold your head up, and began to grab for things.

Or when you started reaching for me because you knew who I was.

I couldn’t believe it when you started really smiling and laughing.

Or when you started eating real food.

Or when your red hair started coming in. Or your long, striking eye lashes.

I couldn’t believe it when you started making lots of noise, which turned into words. When you clearly said “ball” or learned to say “bubble.”

I couldn’t believe it when you started to wave and blow kisses and push with strength and shrug.

I cannot believe what an amazing dancer you are.

Or how fast you learn.

I can’t believe how fast a year has gone. How much my life has changed since you were born. How fast you have grown. How MUCH you have grown.

I can’t wait until you start calling me by name. And when you start hugging me back.

I can’t wait to have conversations with you about your doggy and your mommy and your favorite book and your homework and boys and college and your career.

You are JUST about to start walking and talking.

Which means you are about to take over the world.

It is yours.

I love you.

Happy birthday.

Love,
Auntie Pretzel

This is How I've Been Spending My Time Lately

1. Crying while soothing a 4-day old baby girl. Out of joy, not fear. Babies are intense.
2. Keeping my cousin company as she recovers from aforementioned birth.
3. Doing 20-minutes of yoga a day.
4. Cleaning my house.
5. Preparing for a second interview for the super perfect job!
6. Reading blogs that make me cry. Like this one.
7. Fantasizing about when I am married and have my own kid. Whoa.

Also, I will be guest-blogging HERE during the first week of October!

So stay tuned.

To My Cousin's Baby, on His/Her Impending Arrival

Dear Littlepants,

Your mommy and daddy have left for the hospital.

Your birthday might be today, and it might be tomorrow.

I am writing you to welcome you to the world. I am so excited to meet you.

I'm Annie, your mom's cousin. You'll be seeing a lot of me because I live just down the street, and I spend several evenings a week with your parents and your furry brother, Huck. Currently, he is lounging on his big chair in the living room, watching the window, as if he knows that something exciting is about to arrive.

It is. You!

We just took a long walk around our neighborhood. I'm excited to do that with you when I babysit and give your folks a chance to be together and US a chance to be together! There is a great dog park and playground up the street. I imagine you'll be spending a lot of time there. I know your mom is very excited to go there with you.

Your parents are pretty great. I stayed with them for almost two weeks when I first moved here, and they have taken amazing care of me for these two years. They feed me great food, distract me with amazing television, and your mom and I spend a lot of time watching movies, shopping, and talking about our family. She is an incredibly supportive, caring, and generous lady, and your dad is one of the hardest working and easiest people to be around I've ever met.

They have been planning and anticipating your arrival for...years. You are coming into an incredible home.

I was one of the first people who knew you were on your way, and I am very grateful for that. Your parents worked very hard to make sure you will come into this world as healthy and comfortable as possible.

I don't have very much experience with tiny babies, so I hope you'll be patient with me as I try to figure out which end of the diaper should go up and how to properly feed and burp you. I'll get the hang of it; I'm a quick learner.

And, watch out, when you're a toddler, we'll have lengthy conversations and play sessions. I'm good at those. Just ask your cousin, Chasden, and your aunties.

And when you start school, I can help you with your homework! And make the difficult parts of that SUPER fun. I studied to be a teacher, so if your folks can't help you, I hope you'll call me to get through what you don't understand.

And that goes beyond your studies and homework. I have tears in my eyes as I write this because I know how important my family has become to me and how important it is to have people in your family who are also your friends. Especially when it comes to getting through the parts of life that are difficult to understand.

We are part of a silly, loud, willful, incredibly intelligent family, and sometimes they are...overwhelming. But, what I've learned is that when the going gets tough, our family is fiercely loyal and supportive. We will scoop you up and help you get through the tough times.

I want you to know, before you even arrive, how much I already love you. How much I am so excited to see what kind of person you become. To see the world new through your eyes.

I think you have already changed me, so thank you for that.

See you soon.

Love,
Annie