i have a question...

Sunday, May 31, 2009

Word of the Day, vol. I

Facebook is a strange phenomenon. I wasn’t in a circle of people who were active on Facebook until entering graduate school, and even then, I held out for a few weeks before finally signing up. I only did it after having a few glasses of wine. So, it’s still a new element in my life. One I’m sure I don’t need but can admit to enjoying nonetheless.

One fun thing about Facebook is that it’s put me back in touch with people I literally have not seen in 15 years or more. It’s making the world seem really small. Take this situation, for instance. There was a girl in my brother’s class in elementary school who hung out in his local crowd. I actually ran into her a few years ago at a family friend’s birthday party when I was still living in New York City. They had gone to college together. (Small world.) Now we’re all friends on Facebook. And she has a blog. Which I read. Because she’s sassy. Like, for real.

Anyway, I’m shamelessly ripping off one of ways she has shared things on her blog. Because after being in Berkeley a few weeks ago and being around my ridiculously intelligent college classmates and going to the Poetry Slam, I’ve decided I want to start writing again. Not theatre education writing. Or pop culture writing. But relaying-from-my-past writing. Putting-something-together-creatively writing.

So when UL is beginning a project, she pulls a word out of a bag and writes for ten minutes about whatever comes to mind about that word. Except UL uses this convention to warm-up for writing at her real job…I’m just doing it to kill time in the weeks before I go to Connecticut.

I spent a few minutes recently ripping up little pieces of paper and writing what I thought were really evocative words on them, and then I asked S for her suggestions. I laughed outloud when she said “Bread,” and, of course, weeks later, once I was actually ready to write, it was the first scrap I pulled out of my bag. So, here we are:

Word of the Day: BREAD
When S and I made the decision to move to New York, after graduating college, we talked about the ways in which we’d be willing to save money. And the ways in which we’d spend it. It’s hard not to dream big when you’re about to move across the country to what felt like the biggest and most exciting city in the country. I wanted to see a Broadway show every month. I wanted to start my own theatre company. I wanted to live in a bright, cool apartment, and I always pictured an immaculately white comforter, piles of pillows, throw rugs, a small dog and a hot boyfriend, when I imagined my grown-up life.

I’ve written on this blog many times about the ways in which my reality in New York was crushingly different than what I’d dreamed about. And how it’s only in the last few weeks, even, after not living there for more than a year and a half, that I can enjoy visiting. Those days were dark, depressing, disheartening, unexpectedly so.

There was the ridiculously hot summer that I spent on the couch in our Carroll Gardens apartment, directly under the skylight, sweltering in the sun and checking my emails every half hour for more job postings. The wet early fall when the seam in our ceiling began to crack and it leaked all through the apartment. The fly infestation. The first and only job I’ve ever quit: soliciting for money for the North Shore Animal League on the street…in the ridiculously hot summer. (I lasted two weeks.) The move to the spacious and beautiful but dark loft in SoHo, where you couldn’t get away from the crowds of shoppers and tourists on Broadway or the sounds of wood being whittled first thing in the morning. The flood that happened right before we moved back to my old neighborhood in Brooklyn, where rent was expensive and I still didn’t feel at home. The fairly dead-end and uncreative job I finally clinched; the hour and a half commute. The no money. The no friends. The burnout.

I relied on S in a way that was unfair. In a way that nearly ended our friendship. I was floundering in a way that totally shocked me, and she was succeeding, blossoming even. I felt like I was shrinking in constant comparison. I couldn’t compete, and I didn’t even know when I had signed up for the competition.

By the time I moved out of New York, at the beginning of 2008, I had learned how incredibly difficult it is to live with best friends (once they are, in fact, best friends). I was also finally able to look back on how much S and I had gone through: almost five years of cohabitation, a Broadway show almost every month, countless amazing meals, a lot of alcohol, quotes we still relay, vacations together, spontaneous singing and dance parties, fierce support through various family crises, being each other’s wing women at clubs, dressing up, debriefing in our pajamas after our long nights out.

It’s always been hard for me to fight and disagree with people because I’m always sure it means we’re no longer friends. S and I had about two years of disagreements. And I don’t think they fazed her at all because she has always been sure that’s what family does.

So, the first thing that comes to mind when I think of bread is S. Because when we were first dreaming about our lives in New York, in those cloudy and frenzied days after graduating from college, we dreamed that all we’d eat would be baguettes, feta, cucumbers, and tomatoes. I’d drink water, but she said she’d want vodka.

The amazing thing, the thing that still surprises me, is that, six years after meeting at a callback for Pippin, almost four years since the move to New York, and a year and a half after moving apart, she and I are still dreaming together.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Best. Vacation. Ever.

Perfect timing. I got a mean sore throat Monday evening, once we'd returned to NYC from the Jersey Shore and realized on the train ride home to Boston that it was a pretty full-fledged cold. Considering S was nursing what had to be a combination of allergies and a cold all weekend and the fact that I've traveled 15 of the last 27 days, it's about time that I get sick too, dontcha think?

Despite all that, S and I had a fantastic weekend.

We met up at Port Authority Friday afternoon and it took about three hours to get through the rush hour, holiday traffic to arrive at our destination. We were staying at the Resorts Hotel and Casino right on the Boardwalk. It was a much-needed upgrade from the Super 8 we stayed at the last time we visited AC. (Although, whenever we passed the motel, we sighed with nostalgia.) Our room was adorable...and randomly huge. With what S was convinced was a blood stain under the mirror. (I attest it was too bright a red to be blood and must have been nail polish or makeup.) Still, she kept her shoes on in the room at all times. And didn't let me touch her if I didn't.

After dropping our bags off, we went downstairs to grab some food at Gallagher's Burger Bar in the hotel, where S had a respectable burger and fries, and I had a tasty grilled chicken sandwich and fries, and we both had beers. Then we got gussied up and ready to paint the town. Wandered around our hotel for 1/2 hour looking for a place to drink and came up with nothing. It was the strangest thing. The club in our hotel was lauded as a great place to go, but we seemed overdressed and like the youngest patrons there by 30 years, so we passed. We decided, instead, to head to the Taj Mahal, which has a great club that we'd been to before, but stopped first at the Ego Lounge, where a cover band played early 90's songs and seemed to resent every minute of it. The crowd was a strange combination of old people and young black men, all seemingly having a great time. We had two glasses of terrible wine and got hit on by strange men, one of whom sat down and promptly put eye drops in his eyes and another who was mortally offended that I had never heard of the college he went to. Boys are weird.

We headed to the Casbah, where the infamous drinking-beer-from-my-high-heel incident had happened in 07. Drank, danced, met some lovely guys, passed out at 4 AM.

Saturday, we slept late and searched our hotel for breakfast, after we found out the Buffet closed at 11:15 AM. Breadsticks Cafe and Grill fed us a great breakfast. Strolled along the Boardwalk to the Tropicana Casino, where in the same instance that I won $5, S won $42! We bought saltwater taffy on our long stroll home and then spent the afternoon in the lovely pool at our hotel. It was the perfect temperature, even though the water tasted like ass and there were lots of kids in it.

That night, we had reservations at Buddakan, where we had another fantastic meal: chicken and ginger dumplings, thai chicken salad, beef lo mein, black cod with chili eggplant, and Ohyama sake. Spent that evening realizing how old we are, in that we couldn't muster up the energy to go dancing that night, and drank at a couple bars in the Tropicana: rum and cokes at RiRa and wine at Tango's.

Sunday, we woke up in time to enjoy the Resorts Buffet, then checked out the carnival on the Boardwalk, and I contemplated riding one of those things that straps you in a chair then flings you into the air and lets you bounce around for a while. We spent too much money at the AC Outlets. I decided I needed a cardigan, so I ended up buying three--gray, green, and coral. Plus two tank tops, a pair of jeans, a green scarf, and a pair of turquoise earrings. Stopped at Nathan's for hotdogs for lunch.

We had tickets to see Joel McHale Sunday evening. And headed to the Borgata for dinner before the show, where we ate an INCREDIBLE Antipasto Salad, ravioli, and spicy chicken pizza and drank Proseccor at Wolfgang Puck's American Grille. Then promptly laughed so hard we thought we were going to pee and/or vomit at the comedy show. Chris Porter was the opening act, and he was also wildly hilarious. It was a great evening.

Monday, we wandered out of our hotel to get our 11 AM bus back to the city, grabbing bagels on the way and napped the way home. Finally saw The Wrestler, when we watched it On-Demand, and then headed out to a local sushi place for our last meal together. Went to sleep real early that night.

I think we need to make trips to Atlantic City an every-other-year event. It's just too fun. And wrong. And cheesy. And hilarious.

It was also really surprisingly nice to be back in Brooklyn. Enough time has passed now, so I feel like a visitor there and not like someone who just used to live there and doesn't anymore. That apartment is no longer mine (I didn't even remember how to work the remote!), but it's so familiar, as is the neighborhood, and it was the first time I've ever had a twinge of, I don't want to go back to Boston. I just need to remember that my life is elsewhere too.

And now for your favorite part of every travelogue (and mine): the quotes section. You have to guess who said what:
"You are a ship."
"You are...shhhhh."
"Can I sit on your bed?!"
"He's not looking at you!"/"But his penis is!"
"You're a million stars!"
"I wish I was at work!"
"Ooh! I found some bacon in my skirt!"
"You better watch your mouth! It's going to be nationally blown!"
"I'm only holding on with my fingers!"
"I don't like that this is so hard...Oh. It's actually pretty good. Sort of."/"All of it. She said all of it."/"I did."
"I have water all over my skirt."
"Zabba zabba zooing."
"Whoa. I'm really dizzy."/"That's OK! I'm dizzy like that all the time!"
"You smell like funscreen!"

Special guest quotes section:
"May God take a liking to you and bless you on the slots and tables."--Andree, our Greyhound driver
"You ladies have a lucky day, a safe trip, and a joyous Memorial Day weekend."--Ede, our waiter at Breadsticks Cafe and Grill

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

AI Finale

I must admit that I’m definitely not as invested in this season finale as I’ve previously been. The rumored line-up is amazing, don’t get me wrong (Cyndi Lauper, anyone?!?!), and I’m sure it will be a thoroughly entertaining show. I just don’t have a clear favorite, at this point. I think both Adam and Kris will do very well, both tonight and in whatever careers they end up having. Or maybe I’m just pretty sure that Adam’s win is inevitable, so I don’t think tonight will be that…thrilling. I’m hoping to laugh and cry, though, as I always do. I hope you all haven’t missed these recaps too much. I apologize for being gone for so long; it’s good to be back blogging the show again.

OK, I take it back. I just saw a commercial for the finale, and now I’m excited. Yeah, officially excited. Who am I kidding?

A record 624 million votes all season. People need to take up reading.

HA! For you, for me! Good for them for mocking Randy for his totally inane and obnoxious way of speaking. Ugh, sweetie, honey. Bleh. Kara, condescend much? I’m fully laughing out loud. Paula is totally secretly a genius. And Simon looks like he’d rather be anywhere else.

I’m sure I say this every year, but this is a totally ridiculous show. It’s struck me as even more ridiculous this year, not having watched all season.

Top 13 is starting us off, singing “So What.” Where’s Pink when you need her? Seriously. Last night’s FOX preview of Glee was better than this. Most talented group of singers ever, what?

I can’t wait for David Cook to put out his second and (what has to be) better album. Can you? He’s sounding good live though, and I can’t help but think that this must be about his brother, who recently succumbed to his decade-long battle with brain cancer. He was in the audience for Mariah Carey week, last year, remember?

Time to kill some time with Golden Idol Awards…I’m sure no one minds if I take this chance to tune out, put my dishes away, take a bathroom break, etc. See you back here in a few. Wait, did that guy just call Simon Sassypants? I’m obsessed. He might actually have some kind of future.

First duet of the night: Lil Rounds (that is her real name, btw; she’s named for her grandmother Lillian) and Queen Latifah. Jenny Craig is obviously working for Queen, but she should really not be wearing a black jumpsuit with tapered legs. It is not doing her any favors…These two do make a fierce duo though.

ANOOP!...And Alexis(?) and Jason Mraz, singing “I’m Yours”! That’s pretty exciting. Oh wait, everyone else is singing with them. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be able to name all of the contestants, even if someone was holding a gun to my head. Tragic.

Kris is singing next with Keith Urban. His voice is so radio-ready, I must say. This is lovely and joyous; there’s something about Kris that is really infectious. I’m totally excited for him! (And Simon still looks like he’d rather be anywhere else.)

Now, the Top 13 ladies are singing “Glamorous.” Does anyone care? And it sounded a lot like more than five voices to me. (Has everyone seen (and heard) Fergie in the amazing trailer for Nine? It’s a must-see.) P.S. I totally thought the black and white clad dancers accompanying the Black Eyed Peas were the Top 13 boys for a second.

More Golden Idols. More of me tuning out. (Bikini girl is embarrassing, but the men onstage seem to be thoroughly…moved by her performance. Slash…good for Kara. And then she TOTALLY busted her dress open! HAHAHA! Or was that planned? Now, I’m confused.)

Where are Kris and Adam? I miss them terribly.

Allison Iraheta and Cyndi Lauper singing “Time After Time” = first tears of the night. Magical.

A time-killing check-in with the finalists’ parents. Did they separate them in the theatre because they feared a rumble?

Danny Gokey is now singing “Hello.” I like David Cook’s version better. And now, Danny’s singing a benign duet with Lionel Richie himself.

I’m bored. Only 50 minutes of time wasting left.

I must admit I’ve been waiting to hear Adam all night. I guess I do have a favorite. Or I just want to see what he ends up doing tonight. But what the fuck is he wearing? I just said that out loud. Jeebus creebus. He is taking the stage as if he’s already won, though. Oh, I get it. (Again, just said that out loud. In my living room. Completely alone.) He had to wear that get-up to keep up with KISS. How many of you think Adam actually ever listened to KISS growing up? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Is Santana just there for fun? Oh, he’s there so Matt Giraud and the others can sing with him. I should have known. I wonder when Idol will turn into a contemporary music show. Probably never. Carlos is an Adam fan, apparently. I bet it’s because he’s salsaing while he sings (and with Allison).

Yes, I’m sure neither contestant has ever watched a season of American Idol, and thus has absolutely no idea he will win a car by making it to the finale.

Steve Martin? Michael Sarver? Megan Joy? Who are these people? (Just kidding.) No, but seriously, who’s Michael Sarver? GASP! I just glimpsed a teleprompter feeding them the lyrics. Weak. It’s like seeing the magician’s mirrors. This is a train wreck. I’m bored again. 27 minutes to go.

HAHAHAHA! Top 13 boys singing and dancing to “Do You Think I’m Sexy.” And then Rod Stewart entering via the Lambert Lift. Sometimes this show is really not for the young people in America, but rather for their parents and grandparents. I forget that.

One final Golden Idol Award before the results. (Ruben Studdard, for one, is SHOCKED! That was actually pretty funny.)

Let’s get on with it!

A Queen duet. Of course. What did I expect? This show would not have been complete without one. Actually, this is pretty fun. Too bad Adam completely outsings Kris when given a QUEEN song, of all things. He’s like the next Freddie Mercury, for God’s sake.

OK, this has got to be the last commercial break. I hope you all heeded Ryan’s advice to record the show after the finale, if you were DVRing it tonight.

This is it! Simon just gave them props, genuinely (for once), for being brilliant and unusually nice people. I dig it.

After the nationwide vote of nearly 100 million, the winner of American Idol 2009 is KRIS ALLEN! HUGE UPSET! HUUUUUUUUGE UPSET! Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Shocked.

Now, I’m feeling all cynical. I guess this just means Adam will have more artistic freedom, which is probably best.

Oh, America. How you love an underdog! (And hate a sexually ambiguous musical theater kid who wears eyeliner and nail polish. Hrmph.)

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

AI Top 2

Confession time: I just spent 15 minutes finding FOX on my TV. So yes, I obviously haven’t been watching this season. I had class Tuesday nights again this semester, and, frankly, I didn’t feel like I was missing anything. I would catch up Wednesdays and Thursdays by reading Entertainment Weekly online, where I got most of my impressions of this season. I also heard contradicting stories from people in my life: S said this season was boring, except for Adam (I agreed—the clips I had seen of the performances made everyone but him look like a deer in headlights, even Kris), but my cousin and even my professor kept exclaiming how exciting this season has been. Either way, I’m very excited to be able to watch and blog about the final two and the finale tomorrow. I put it in my calendar a while ago, and I am committed to providing you all with my take on these last shows.

Now, I have some things I’d like to say about my impressions of this season. First of all, it seems to me that the judges have been even less useful this season than in previous ones. I don’t know why they needed a fourth and I’m not sure anyone likes Kara. I’m curious to see what I think firsthand from tonight’s show. Secondly, everyone is all atwitter about this Adam Lambert character. It seems he’s the favorite and that this is really his competition to lose. Personally, a) I think he’s sexy; b) I wonder if he’ll win, considering ALL the attention about his sexuality and Kris’s wholesomeness and middle-America pull (where do we think Danny’s fans’ votes will go?); c) his performance of “Mad World” is probably my favorite performance of anything I’ve heard all year. In fact, it impelled me to search for obscure clips of him on Youtube, and I’ve found some juicy ones:

This is him singing “Come to Me, Bend to Me” from Brigadoon. I found this and figured they wouldn’t do an Andrew Lloyd Webber night this season.
This is a pre-nail-polish-and-guy-liner, blond(!) Adam singing at his high school graduation.
Adam as Joshua in The Ten Commandments the Musical Yes, that’s Val Kilmer as Moses. Isn’t that hilarious?!
Adam as Fiyero in the LA Production of Wicked
Boy can sing. I mean, like, actually.

And finally, Kris…a) friggin adorable; b) does he stand a chance at all against Adam? (probably only if the parenthetical statement in point b above happens); and c) the beginning of his performance of “Heartless” from last week was INCREDIBLE, and I give him props for really earning his place in the top 2.

Here we go. This…is American Idol. Ah, how I’ve missed this.

(They’re both so cute.) So, tonight, Adam and Kris will sing their favorite song from the season, a song chosen by creator Simon Fuller, and the winner’s song, co-written by Kara. Let’s hope it doesn’t suck. But it will. And, oh good, Ryan warned everyone to record the show AFTER the finale tomorrow because the show is due to run long. Remember what happened to me last year? Grrrrr. I’ll be watching live, thankyouverymuch.

Adam’s starting us off with “Mad World.” In a trenchcoat. And lots of fog. I honestly can’t decide if I just want him to stick to Broadway. He’s absolutely captivating, and he obviously feels his songs (or at least acts like he does). I’m just not sure I buy him as a rockstar. Or even a pop star. (Holy shit, Anthony Hopkins is in the audience. And that crazy applause was not for Adam; it was for Danny, when the camera landed on him.) And I agree with Simon, as per usual, about the theatricality.

Now, the question is: do you think that Adam just asks for the crazy production details, like the red staircase and blue light? And stage fog? Or are the producers pimping him out?

Kris is starting with “Ain’t No Sunshine.” Solid! I also appreciate that he’s playing the piano. I predict this is going to be a tight race. Oh, Paula. I see your inanities are still as rambly and vague as ever. She just told him he “Allenized his trademark.” Huh?

Round 2 begins with Adam singing “Change is Gonna Come,” chosen by Simon Fuller. Whoa. He’s pulled out all the stops. His vocal control is pretty impressive, and I have no problem picturing him headlining a concert. No problem. The judges are in conniptions about that performance.

It’s such an exciting show; my heart is almost pounding.

Kris is up next with “What’s Goin’ On.” (Good choices, Fuller!) Not enough has been written about what Kris’s mouth does when he sings. It’s pretty adorable…It’s almost impossible to compare these last two performances; they’re such totally different singers. It will definitely be interesting to see what they do when given the same song to perform. (Btdubs, I officially don’t like Kara.)

The single is called “No Boundaries.” I’m scared. I always am. He should win just for having the cajones to wear shoulder pads and silver pants on national TV. Um. This is a little bit of a train wreck. I consistently hate how much of an anticlimax the winner’s singles are at this part of the season. They don’t allow the contestants to have a big, satisfying finish with an actually good song. Argh.

Kris is up next with the same crappy single. He’s making it slightly more palatable. And I understood the words this time. Does that mean that he should win? I plead the fifth. The judges seem to be cushioning the blow of what they seem to think is a foregone conclusion that Adam will take it. We’ll find out soon enough!

Monday, May 18, 2009


This clip was played on the Tonight Show when we saw the taping. Apparently, Judd Apatow and Adam Sandler are old friends and this is real footage...

That's totally me giggling at :28.

Sunday, May 17, 2009

The Long-Awaited and Lengthy California Post

It struck me several times throughout the trip that I should have been posting. It was a fun-filled whirlwind of a trip with more hilarious details than I can possibly include here. Six days and five nights in LA and four days and four nights in Berkeley. We got home super late Friday night and I've slept 20 1/2 hours in two nights since then.

Some highlights, life lessons, and fun facts lie below.

SE's uncle is the Head Chef at NBC Studios, so we got free lunch (including the best chocolate chip cookie I've EVER had) and the artists' treatment at a taping of the Tonight Show, with Adam Sandler, Judd Apatow, and Soulja Boy as guests. I swear you can hear my cackle on the telecast from May 7. Also, I walked by Apatow as he pulled his suit out of his huge car and he walked right by me as he entered the studio. I nearly peed. Then, later in the day, I passed the Access Hollywood crew room, where the men there were singing "We Didn't Start the Fire." The women's restroom smelled like wintergreen and the soap smelled like coconut. Just FYI.

I spent some great time with my cousins and the baby. He and SE seemed to be soulmates. We ate great, authentic Mexican food at the Farmer's Market and took lots of pictures and videos of Chazzy being the charming, brilliant almost-three-year-old that he is. I've settled into Boston life, but it was incredibly soul-feeding for me to be around family for a while this week.

SE's uncle threw us a cocktail party the Friday night we spent with him. (This man has been called the "Mayor of West Hollywood," so it seemed like all the gay glitterati were there, and I was the only woman at the party, which was surprisingly disconcerting but also slightly hilarious, especially since I looked HOT and no one cared.)

Recovered the next day with diner food and chilling by the spa on the back patio, playing Six Degrees of Separation with SE's uncle's tenant. (SE's uncle's house has the nicest bathroom I've been in in a long time. I was green with envy about it, and the back patio is also a place I've missed since we left it. I also miss his dog, Jake.) Danced that night at a gay club called Cherry Pop until not too late. We both wanted to hear ONE GOOD SONG and then knew we'd be ready for bed, so when "Single Ladies" came on we shook our booties something fierce and then left, breathless and satisfied with the evening.

Our last full day in LA we finally ventured outside of Beverly Hills and ended up at the Getty, where we saw two incredible photography exhibits ( Paul Outerbridge's "Command Performance" and Jo Ann Callis's "Woman Twirling"). They were haunting and inspiring. The evening was spent at a drag one-woman show, Miss Coco Peru is Undaunted, which was mostly hilarious and also slightly bad. I had another celebrity sighting that night, since Jane Lynch was in attendance.

We felt like such grown-ups in LA because we rented a car to get around, and by the end of the week, we were navigating Beverly Hills like natives. Although, SE's iPhone's GPS came in quite handy, and we made a great traveling team all week. (Little known fact about me, I'm an incredible first mate.)

Headed up to Oakland, where K generously picked us up and fed us homemade minestrone, until my mom was home from her acting class Monday night. K also gave me four books AND a pair of shoes. She's the best.

Tuesday morning, we had breakfast with Mom at Saul's and then I showed SE around Berkeley. I felt surprisingly at home all week. It was so nice to be back in my old stomping grounds and to be back on campus. And it was especially nice to share this part of my life with SE. He seemed to gain an even better understanding of me having seen where I became who he knows and loves. I'd move back to Northern California in a second, I decided.

Met up with my old roommate and great friend, M, that evening for sushi and organic ice cream (Black Sesame and Lavender, to be exact), while SE ventured into SF alone to meet an old friend. When M and I get together we seem to lose time, and suddenly, it was 10:30 and we had to part again.

Basically the only reason SE wanted to join me in NorCal was to see the Apple Headquarters in Cupertino, so after having a big breakfast with K on Wednesday, we headed south and ate lunch on the campus. The most exciting thing about the place for me was that the restrooms on campus have free tampons. I wouldn't have been able to survive that day without K because SE was in his own universe. He was very excited. And then spent nearly $100 at the retail store.

We did a very Berkeley thing that night by attending the Berkeley Poetry Slam at The Starry Plough, where we met B. It made me want to write again, so stay tuned as I figure out how to get some new stuff posted here. Then had breakfast with B the next day, at Guerrilla Cafe. After napping and resting for several hours, K and I wanted to show SE the Castro, so we finally headed to the city together and walked the forty minutes from downtown to the Castro. As we passed the Orpheum Theater and realized that Wicked was playing there, we vowed to return in time to put our names into the lottery to get tickets that night. Ate lunch, rode a trolley, took pictures, SE got cruised a little bit, then headed back to the theater and I WON TWO TICKETS!!! (I never win anything!) The show was mostly magical and only slightly disappointing. The standby for Elphaba was INCREDIBLE, but I was underwhelmed by the book. Still, I was so happy to have seen it, and it was a lovely way to end the trip. I even got a pin that says "I won the Wicked lottery!"

For those of you who were concerned, the flights were all fine. I was very impressed with my ability to stay calm, considering I was in five planes in nine days. We were both very happy to return to Boston, although when we landed, I was slightly confused. Since when do I live in Boston?!

Mostly, I'm impressed that SE and I didn't kill each other. Not even close. I do always forget that I have a hard time traveling, let alone traveling WITH another person. Nine days away from my own bed is about four too many. Note to self.

And finally, here are some choice quotes from the trip, with guest appearances by K and B:
"Look at how much fun we're having!"-SE
"There is a seat belt in my sphincter."-SE
"I thought the closer we got the more I could hump you."-SE
"Banana in the cooter."-AK
"Don't go rogue."-AK
"Reverse on Fairfax?"-SE
"Smegma is the wrong audience for everybody."-AK
"I'm seriously going to have an orgasm because we're gonna be 10 minutes early. Seriously. My vagina's wet."-AK
"I'm not even gonna tell you you have lettuce on your boob."-SE
"People who live (in Salt Lake City) have names like Michael Taylor."-AK
"Whatever. I'm gay and I like sex."-SE
"I can't reach my stuff!"-AK
"I feel away!"-SE
"Help her."-SE
"It's one-way grass."-K
(Impersonating Steve Jobs) "What do I need at the store today? Flour, milk, and Pixar."-AK
"I have a Samsung phone. I'm going to be tarred and feathered."-AK
"I'm putting my ear plugs in but we can still make out for a while."-AK
"My vagina's imploding on itself."-AK
"A deer! Play dead!"-B
"I love...the world...of theater...and gay sex!"-SE
"I smell a penis from across the Bay. I need to go find it."-K
"Penis, can you hear me?"-SE
"If he's taking a shit, I'm gonna smack him in his face when he comes out!"-SE
"Ooh! Move your chair! It vibrates!"-AK

I leave on Friday for a weekend in Atlantic City with S. Get excited about, what is sure to be, another juicy post.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

It's Here.

Cute-voiced kid on the street: MOMMY! MOMMY!
Kid's Mommy: Yeah. You see the flowers?
Kid: Yeah!
Kid's Mommy: Yeah, they're growing.
Kid: Why dem growin?
Kid's Mommy: Because. It's springtime.